Should you choose a dating matchmaker? – the positives

So I’ve looked at the reasons you may not want to spend a large amount of money on a matchmaker http://abijude.com/2017/09/should-you-choose-a-matchmaker-the-negatives/?preview_id=230&preview_nonce=a326f437f8&_thumbnail_id=231&preview=true

and I’d like to look at the reasons you might want to choose a matchmaker and my advice if you decide to go down this route…

  1. You will probably be approaching a matchmaker with some strong emotional reasons for joining, all bundled up into high expectations about who you can expect to meet if you spend this money. Matchmakers are not magicians. They will not be able to produce 5 George Clooney lookalikes nor change your way of interacting with people. What they may be able to do is introduce you to a selection of like-minded people who are also looking for a relationship, loosely based on matching criteria.
  2. You are trusting a relative stranger to interpret what you are looking for and then match you with  someone who comes close from their pool of clients. This does give you a targeted approach to being able to meet a selection of matches without you needing to find them. If the agency is good they will also have a certain amount of information on the match (as much as this is possible given most agencies cannot do police checks and may only be able to check if the clients credit rating is good). however, they will have been interviewed and asked to sign a contract so this person should therefore be safer than meeting someone random in a bar or on the internet.
  3. Many date coaches, matchmakers and dating consultants care about their work and as it is their business they also have a vested interest in finding you a lovely match.
  4. As it is a service, you have someone with which to discuss your matches, dates and also someone to talk to about your general dating experiences. This can be very supportive as dating can be challenging.
  5. In summary, be very clear about what you’re signing up to, have clear expectations and be prepared to lower them around appearance, height, age limits etc. Get clear feedback in writing about what happens if you do not meet anyone or if you think some of your dates did not meet your criteria. Negotiate on the fee, as there will generally be some room for the consultant to come down. Look out for special offers in the summer months or holiday periods. Read the contract, so you are clear what you are agreeing to.

If you are thinking about joining a matchmakers or have joined one and had a bad experience, please contact me to discuss how I could help…http://abijude.

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